Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about failure. I’ve been thinking about all the poor exams or projects I’ve submitted, all the people I’ve let down, and all the things I said I’d do but didn’t. Specifically, I’ve been thinking about failing as it pertains to achievement, such as not being able to realize a goal or not meeting your expectations.

In modern society, I believe it’s rather unfortunate that failure is treated as something we should strive to avoid at all costs. Too often we are told it’s wrong to fail, and when we don’t achieve something it’s a reflection of ourselves. This is not a healthy way of viewing failure. Failure is not wasted time or energy but rather a stepping stone to success. What follows is my opinion of what a healthy view of failure can look like.

Failure as a Road to Success

The road to sustainable success is an iterative one that is fueled by failure. In short, if you want to be successful (whatever that may look like to you) you need to fail proudly and you need to fail often. It is in this way that we grow and learn as quickly as possible. Was it not Thomas Edison who said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work”. Failure is also a means of proving, to yourself or the world, that you have tried something. Consider how much more you have achieved in trying something and failing compared to someone who was too scared to try in the first place.

It is often the case we are told that when we fail often we need to be resilient. However, were failure not viewed as something to be avoided in the first place, I truly believe there would be no need for that kind of resiliency. Imagine being proud of your failures. What if instead of gloating about how successful you may be, you shared your failures with pride? When you fail you discover a way that doesn’t work, add that to your collection of “ways that don’t work” and then try again.

To provide a counter-example, there are occasions in which people find success on their first attempt without fail. These cases are a rarity and often a product of incredible luck. Certainly, this kind of success is not sustainable or repeatable.

A Healthier View of Failure

I want to begin seeking failure every day. I want to intentionally do something I know will not work, in the hopes of paradoxically finding something that will.

There’s an interesting technique in psychology known as paradoxical intention that is used to treat cases like insomnia or anxiety. Essentially, the technique is built upon the premise that in fearing something we only bring it about more frequently, while incredible intention to achieve something, brings us farther from ever finding it. I believe this idea can be applied to failure as well. By embracing failure and seeking it out, we will inadvertently find success more often.

My goal is to continually pursue hard things in spite of the possibility of failure. In my opinion, someone who fails many times over will accomplish far more than someone who only does things they know with near certainty they’ll succeed at.